A story about Jack and Diane (apologies to John Mellencamp)
Time is money, so to make a long story short…
Jack and Diane were like two ships passing in the night
Diane was always a bridesmaid, never the bride
she was all dressed up with nowhere to go
I’m telling you she was dressed to kill
but you see all that glitters isn’t gold
you sure cannot judge a book by it cover !
Now, Jack had a face only a mother could love
he was all thumbs
and as thick as a brick
but he was raking in the money hand over fist
unfortunately all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
however, as they say, beggars can’t be choosers
and everyone knows two heads are better than one
so you can bet your bottom dollar they both learned
love was better late than never
through some twist of fate she was in the right place at the wrong time
he ran in like a bat out of hell
a veritable bull in a china shop
with his two left feet he tripped her up.
Diane went flying ass over tea kettle!
He just grinned and said “fancy meeting you here.”
For her it was not love at first sight
as they say, you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink!
BUT no worries, dear reader
the bigger they are the harder they fall
and Love is blind so they decided to tie the knot
“Diane, I’ll love you through thick and thin”
“Jack, I’ll love you until the cows come home”
On their honeymoon they lay naked as a jaybirds
and as snug as bugs in a rug
they put a bun in Diane’s oven that very night!
All’s well that ends well!
(Fast forward 1o months)
Jack was all thumbs and as high as a kite
he managed to throw the baby out with the bathwater!
Diane got all bent out of shape
so its back to the drawing board
I guess you really can’t have your cake and eat it too
catch my drift?
- A reblog from June 17, 2013